Going to Vegas this weekend

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 11:18 am

The OL and I are going on a long weekend trip to Vegas this weekend. Any recommendations? I suppose we'll spend a while doing the strip sightseeing thingy, but, I'd rather just wander out in the desert for a few good hikes. We also plan on going to the western end of the Grand Canyon. Looks to be a few hour drive.

Mikey, I know you lived there for a while as you regularly tell us what a shithole it was. So, you know what a midle-aged fat guy likes to do. Any recommendations?

Cornhusker · Post by **Cornhusker** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 12:14 pm

Ya might wanna be careful with the random desert hike. You may approach Julio's buried contraband and become a real life Breaking Bad re-enactment.

When you're walking the strip, forget saying "hey, lets head for such and such casino." cuz you can see the pretty flashing lights from where you're standing. The damn place looks like you can get from point A to point B in a few minutes... Ain't so, you'll be walking the Bataan Death march if it's a hot day.
Grab a cab or the bus.

Food is everywhere. Go hungry.
This from being there almost 20 years ago.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 12:52 pm

If it was me, I'd be heading for the Pinball Hall of Fame with some quarters and play a few of them. Have fun.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 12:59 pm

Wolfman wrote:If it was me, I'd be heading for the Pinball Hall of Fame with some quarters and play a few of them. Have fun.

That would be cool

Rooster · Post by **Rooster** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 2:49 pm

If you're going to do a helicopter tour, use Papillion or Maverick, but don't encourage them to give you an E ticket ride. Hydraulic jack stall and all in those Aerospatiale/Eurocopter/Airbus machines is a bitch when the GC wall is approaching at 120 knots...

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Wed Dec 07, 2016 3:35 pm

smackaholic wrote:Grand Canyon

There's a wonderful attraction there called "hurl yourself off the edge of a cliff." I strongly recommend you try it.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 4:21 pm

smackaholic wrote:The OL and I are going on a long weekend trip to Vegas this weekend. Any recommendations? I suppose we'll spend a while doing the strip sightseeing thingy, but, I'd rather just wander out in the desert for a few good hikes. We also plan on going to the western end of the Grand Canyon. Looks to be a few hour drive.

Mikey, I know you lived there for a while as you regularly tell us what a shithole it was. So, you know what a midle-aged fat guy likes to do. Any recommendations?

Your spreadsheet is accurate. Lived there for five years. Moved back to Cali in 1999 and haven't been back to Vegas since, except once I think as a stopover on the way to Park City.

It changed a lot in the five years we were there, and I'm sure it's changed a lot since. In the short time we were there they had just opened Luxor and Treasure Island and built Monte Carlo, New York-New York, Bellagio, Mandalay Bay, Ventian, and Paris. Gambling in Vegas is kind of like horses. The best tip for gambling on horses is not to bet on horses. That being said, when the kids were little we'd just pile them in the car once a month or so and drive up and down the strip at night time.

There are definitely some cool places out of town. The Grand Canyon is driveable, and Hoover Dam is on the way there. If you want to do some hiking, Red Rock Canyon is pretty short drive. You can take Flamingo Road west through Summerlin, or the southern route through Blue Diamond. I'd recommend the southern route to get there (more scenic) and Flamingo to get back, depending on where you're staying. There's a great scenic loop through the park if you don't want to get out of your car, and some great hiking opportunities.

http://www.redrockcanyonlv.org/

A little farther outside of town, to the northwest, is Mt. Charleston. The peak is about 12,000 ft. I think but the roads don't go up that high.

https://goo.gl/maps/Ju5iacxpCCJ2

http://www.gomtcharleston.com/uploads/S ... il_map.pdf

There's a lodge and restaurant if you take the southern fork. Lee Canyon to the north is a small ski area (three lifts when we were there) with a big parking lot at about 7,000 ft. Both areas are great jumping off points for hiking, if it's not covered with snow. Some spectacular views of the desert on the way up the mountain.

Another nice place, within pretty easy driving distance, is Valley of Fire State Park. Near the northern tip of Lake Mead

http://parks.nv.gov/parks/valley-of-fire-state-park/

If you're lucky you might see a couple of Federation Starship Captains, and/or Malcolm McDowell.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 4:27 pm

If you're willing to drive a couple of hours into Utah, Zion National Park is also a nice option.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 5:54 pm

I suggest cruising up & down the strip.

Sin,
Tupac

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 6:08 pm

We were thinking of going to Zion. Been there before, it is beautiful. Would love to go back to Bryce, but I think it is a bit much of a drive and quite likely snowed in. May do the helo/plane ride over to the big ditch as well.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 6:25 pm

My advice for Vegas:

Bring money. Lots and lots of money. Even if you don't gamble, if you're not familiar with the place, your jaw will drop at the cost of everything, if you're on/near the Strip (Las Vegas Blvd).

A couple of the big casinos (NYNY comes to mind) will pick on you if you sit down at the el-cheapo slot machines. Their goal will be to get you drunk very quickly to embolden you to move up to a non-el-cheapo pursuit -- don't fall for it, but use it to your advantage, and your liver's detriment. If you have a car (driving the Strip is a fucking nightmare, and it's faster to walk), you can get away from there, and hit up the liquor store, since if you actually buy booze on the Strip... you can't afford it. For food, hit up the buffets -- generally good grub, and fpr $50, probably the cheapest meal you'll find.

I think those helo trips to the Grand Canyon are several hundred bucks.

Definitely do some walking on the Strip -- you'll find a freakish disproportion of the really fat, disgusting folks are wearing Texas Longhorns gear.

And hitting up the sportsbook on gameday is pretty fun, even if just for a few bucks.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 6:54 pm

Dinsdale wrote:My advice for Vegas:

Bring money. Lots and lots of money. Even if you don't gamble, if you're not familiar with the place, your jaw will drop at the cost of everything, if you're on/near the Strip (Las Vegas Blvd).

have plastic, will travel

A couple of the big casinos (NYNY comes to mind) will pick on you if you sit down at the el-cheapo slot machines. Their goal will be to get you drunk very quickly to embolden you to move up to a non-el-cheapo pursuit -- don't fall for it, but use it to your advantage, and your liver's detriment. If you have a car (driving the Strip is a fucking nightmare, and it's faster to walk), you can get away from there, and hit up the liquor store, since if you actually buy booze on the Strip... you can't afford it. For food, hit up the buffets -- generally good grub, and fpr $50, probably the cheapest meal you'll find.

my fat ass really should stear clear of buffets. Recommendations on good real mexican grub would be appreciated. We U&R gringos don't have the sort of authentic places you left coasters do.

I think those helo trips to the Grand Canyon are several hundred bucks.

yeah. may, may not. depends on how cheap i am feeling at the moment.

Definitely do some walking on the Strip -- you'll find a freakish disproportion of the really fat, disgusting folks are wearing Texas Longhorns gear.

my plan is to rent bikes for our strip wandering

And hitting up the sportsbook on gameday is pretty fun, even if just for a few bucks.

gambling on sports may be even dumber than gambling on horses. For me, anyway. To be honest, I am not much of a gambler. I can find casinos just as glitzy a hour from my house. Well, maybe not quite as glitzy, but mohegan sun is right up there. I believe it is technically larger than any of the vegas ones.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 07, 2016 7:07 pm

On the Strip, a bicycle, especially on a weekend, would be worthless (and I'm a big bike-if-possible guy). You'll see. As mentioned earlier, just walking down the strip is a bitch... but the upside is that you can buy drinks on the freaking sidewalk.

You can throw down $5 on a football game, if so inclined.

And no, you don't have casinos as glitzy. Take a walk through the Venetian and get back to me.

Fuck if I know on good Mexican food (I believe "good" Mexican food only exists west of the Mississippi). Get away from the Strip and find a taco truck -- that's usually where you find the best Mexican food Out West.

And those Mexicans slapping fliers against their hands are advertising hookers. Gets pretty annoying after a while.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu Dec 08, 2016 5:41 pm

KC Scott wrote:

Go down towards old Vegas

You probably mean Downtown.

Moving Sale · Post by **Moving Sale** » Thu Dec 08, 2016 6:09 pm

Why are you fuckers even going to Vegas if you are not spending all your time on hookers and blow?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Fri Dec 09, 2016 2:32 am

Don't do blow and I am bringing my own hooker with me.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Dec 09, 2016 2:37 am

smackaholic wrote:Don't do blow

No shit?

Sin,
Your Physique

trev · Post by **trev** » Sat Dec 10, 2016 11:01 am

What hotel are you staying at?

I recommend hitting up the spa at Mandalay Bay.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Tue Dec 13, 2016 11:07 pm

Going to the Kobalt 400 there in March. I worked in Vegas area building golf courses back in the day so have seen a lot of it. Probably have to get some action on the race if I am going to see it happen as well.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Dec 14, 2016 12:51 am

Drove there in May 2012 after my daughters grad school ceremony in New Mexico. One nice side trip on the way was the scenic drive thru Sedona, AZ except the traffic sucked. Had been to the Grand Canyon before so didn't need to go that route. Hoover Dam was definitely a must see, despite the traffic.

Vegas (once we finally got there) is a gigantic clusterfuck, hotter than hell even in May. Stayed at the Excaliber hotel/casino where we got a nice deal for a 2 night stay. I won like $600 the first night on slots, so being a dumbfuck, decided to stay an extra day/night. Of course, I gave every dime of that back and then some. Oh well, I didn't plan on leaving a winner. At least we had gas money to get home.

Once I parked the car in the Excaliber garage, we didn't drive again for the next 3 days. They have a pretty nice monorail system that got us all around the strip/casino's. You don't want to walk far in Vegas when it's 100 degrees. The one time we did walk a bit I got thirsty and paid $5 for a bottle of water.

Anyways, once I was done getting fleeced, we put LV in the rear view mirror. I don't regret going but once was enough, I'll never go back. There's an alternate reality there I want no part of. Besides that, I can get bent over by the casino's in KC just fine and be home before the tears dry.

LV to KC is one hellacious long drive. Made it to Grand Junction, CO the first day (Utah was a good view much of the way) then GJ to KC the next.

That, I believe, was the longest stretch of road I had ever trekked in 1 day. 800 miles or so. I'd never make it as a long haul trucker.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Dec 14, 2016 3:52 am

trev wrote:What hotel are you staying at?

I recommend hitting up the spa at Mandalay Bay.

Holiday inn club vacation. It is a timeshare about 2 blocks off the strip. It is one of those deals where they give you 3 nights if you sit through their sales pitch. They been bugging me to do this every time I reserve a room with them. Nice place. Good location. If you go out the front gate you are looking across a yuuuge parking lot right at the big as Ferris wheel. About a 10-15 minute walk to the heart of the strip.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Dec 14, 2016 4:07 am

We leave tomorrow. Went to red rock canyon, very nice, GC West also nice but them hualapi injuns wring us pale faces for every dime they can, but it was a nice trip. If I go back, I'll save the 20 bones to walk out on the glass platform. Great views right next to it.

We reserved a mustang rag top. Would have had to wait a bit for one so we took the hardtop Cameron they offered. Mixed feelings about the Camaro. That V-6 pulls like a mofo pretty much right off idle and it was likely the best car I have ever driven in the curvy roads. But, jeebus, it is claustrophobic. Feel like you are driving a very quick,good handling tank. After a day brought it back and got the stang. Decent enough rig, but no where close to the drivers car that the camaro is. Haven't
Opted the hood but I think it is the turbo 4 Pulls decent enough but it don't like cheap gas. Pings like a bitch if you stuff it.

Also did the Hoover dam tour. Amazing what those primitives could do back in the 30s. What an engineering marvel.

Wandered the strip a bit. OL dumped a few bucks in the slots but I steered clear.

Would not come back for the vegas thing, but will definitely come back to the desert. It really is an amazing place, especially to a U&R boy that is used to seeing lots of green stuff everywhere.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 12:19 am

War Wagon wrote:
LV to KC is one hellacious long drive. Made it to Grand Junction, CO the first day (Utah was a good view much of the way) then GJ to KC the next.

That, I believe, was the longest stretch of road I had ever trekked in 1 day. 800 miles or so. I'd never make it as a long haul trucker.

First, Nevada sucks.

And if you think Utah is scenic... you're probably a Flyover.

I drove from Portland to LV with very few stops... that was about 24 hrs of suck.

Probably my longest stretch of driving. But did a few last summer -- drove from McAllen, TX to Albuquerque (voluntarily, even -- with the layovers and whatnot, it wasn't much different from flying... and I'd never seen Texas before... and if I never see it again, I'll be a happy man). Had a flight cancelled in Denver late on a Sunday night, and had to be at work the next afternoon in Springfield, MO... to the car rental counter we went. If I never see Kansas or Missouri again, I'll view it as a Texas-sized bit of luck. Also drove from Nashville to Tampa... voluntarily, but there was no big rush to get there. I did learn that Kennesaw, GA hates sports bars -- finally found one (after GPSing up about 5 closed ones), that held hope -- sign out front said "Your Home For The NFL"... sounds great...

they had a game on... the one on broadcast TV... for realz.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Thu Dec 15, 2016 12:57 am

Dinsdale wrote:I did learn that Kennesaw, GA hates sports bars

How so?

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 1:02 am

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:I did learn that Kennesaw, GA hates sports bars
How so?

Dinsdale wrote:finally found one (after GPSing up about 5 closed ones), that held hope -- sign out front said "Your Home For The NFL"... sounds great...

they had a game on... the one on broadcast TV... for realz.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Thu Dec 15, 2016 2:04 am

I have no idea what it is that you're trying to get across. Have you been drinking Goob's toilet wine this evening?

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 2:53 am

OK, I'll type slowly.

My coworker and I stopped in Kennesaw, GA to take a break from driving (Tampa is a long freaking way from Nashville), grab a bite, and watch some football on a Sunday afternoon. Once in Kenesaw, we fired off the ol' smartphone, and punched in "sports bar." There was one close... allegedly. It was out of business. Next one up... out of business. Next one... out of business. Next one... out of business. Next one... GPS took us down some backass road to some shack, where I was quite certain I was about to be Deliveranced.

Drove past "Your Home Of The NFL" on the way back to the freeway. The Home Of The NFL had a freaking antenna and broadcast TV.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 2:54 am

Kennesaw Georgia is known for exactly one thing. They passed an ordinance that says that everybody has to have a gun. No seriously they actually did that shit. Doesn't surprise me that they're backwards in other ways.

Sent from my plush penthouse suite in Screw Michigan's dome. It's in the District.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Thu Dec 15, 2016 3:13 am

Okie-dokie...now I get it.

Dinsdale wrote: Drove past "Your Home Of The NFL" on the way back to the freeway. The Home Of The NFL had a freaking antenna and broadcast TV.

Well to be fair, they didn't claim it to be a nice home...or a big home.
People apply their own unique interpretation on the word "home", you know.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 3:20 am

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 4:33 pm

Dinsdale wrote:
And if you think Utah is scenic... you're probably a Flyover.

Of course I'm a flyover, no secret that, and quite content with my geographical locale. When people describe us flyovers like it's an insult, we just smile and wave as they fly over, knowing very few of them will ever crowd our space. Crowded enough as is and I despise crowds and traffic jams. So please and by all means, the coasters can stay right where they're at. No room for them here.

But you're probably right about the majority of Utah not being all that scenic, but there were some nice places. We stopped at several along the road that were worth a longer look about, even took a few pictures. We weren't in a great hurry.

I'd never seen Texas before... and if I never see it again, I'll be a happy man).

Been thru Texas several times and tend to agree with that sentiment. Last year, the stretch of I-35 from Dallas-Ft. Worth to Austin, maybe 100 miles, was under construction the whole freaking way. It took like 3 hours and was a white knuckle nightmare I will never allow myself to go thru again. The locals claim it's been under a perpetual state of construction their whole life and probably always will be. I believe that.

Going back to KC we took some back roads to completely bypass I-35 almost to the Oklahoma border... but drove thru a monsoon the whole way so it wasn't much better.

Still, I never thought I'd be so glad to see Oklahoma.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 5:39 pm

Bad enough just flying over Texas.

Rudolph · Post by **Rudolph** » Thu Dec 15, 2016 6:31 pm

Mikey wrote:Bad enough just flying over Texas.

I always try to save up about three days of shit and then drop the bombs somewhere over texas every christmas eve.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Fri Dec 16, 2016 6:24 am

I spent a week driving around Texas while on a business trip. This picture is about the highlight of the non urban areas. It kind of sums up Texas.

Sent from my plush penthouse suite in Screw Michigan's dome. It's in the District.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Fri Dec 16, 2016 1:09 pm

Dinsdale wrote:And if you think Utah is scenic... you're probably a Flyover.

Or maybe you just have functional retinas.

Bryce Canyon is one of the most amazing places I have ever seen. Zion ain't bad either. The Canyonlands in general are pretty epcot. Of course "scenic" is a very subject term. The fat rolls on the back of some Portland Killer Whale prolly look scenic to you at 3AM on a Sunday morning, eye of the beholder and such. I get that for you, natural enormous wood needs to be involved.....not THAT kind of wood, you perverts, I was talking about Doug Firs, Western Cedar, etc....

I think we should all just agree that we are fortunate enough to live in a country that has an amazing variety of stunning vistas. I admit that the ones in the west are turned up to 11, but even us easterners have a few. I suspect that even one corner of Misery, the Ozarks prolly pleasant enough. I think you may be right about Texas though. Ugh. Having spent a few hours in Dumas with RV technical difficulties (which Ricky and Dwayne fixed long enough to get me to Kansas), I must say that we should just build a Donal Trump worthy wall around the entire Teeehas panhandle and send all our murderers, terrorists, pedophiles, etc there. And by send, I mean station a catapult outside the way and just lob them over. When my otherwise very trustworthy little Toyota Sunrader limped into Witchita Falls before I stopped and had a real mechanic work on it, I must say that while equally as boring topography-wise, it was the whitest place I have ever been. Very neat, clean and republican looking. The kind of place you'd wanna raise your kids. Prolly couldn't find a decent rib joint or messican though.

The next state on that roadie was you know what. Terrain wise, quite a bit like New England, actually. Some rolling hills, plenty of trees. Where it differed was in the places where man had put his mark. "His mark" in Mo. consisted largely of billboard signs for strip clubs along the interstate.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Dec 16, 2016 9:59 pm

I actually enjoy my trips to the desert (since there's one pretty close)... so long as they're infrequent.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sat Dec 17, 2016 1:29 am

I've been to your desert. I recall it kind of sucking. Mostly flat as I recall. The desert in the Nevada/Arizona/Utah area is chock full of mountains and canyons which make it kinda cool. I've also been to the big daddy of deserts, the Sahara (drive from Alexandria to Cairo and the Pyramids). That was a whole new level of suck, although seeing the Pyramids should be on everybody's bucket list.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sat Dec 17, 2016 2:11 am

smackaholic wrote:I've been to your desert. I recall it kind of sucking. Mostly flat as I recall

Some parts. And some parts have huge mountains (Blues, Wallowas, Strawberrys, and more... Steens Mountain is about the biggest "ridge" you'll ever see), which can pile up a little snow in winter (the only time they ever see any precipitation... shit is dry, hence the "desert" thing).

But as a whole, Eastern Oregon/Southern Idaho/Northern Nevada are pretty much the suck... one must pick their spots, the cool ones are pretty awesome.

There's places like this:

And there's places like this (obvbiously taken in late witer/early spring, since there's a few green blades of scrubgrass):

Most of the state is the latter.

Bend/Sisters/Sunriver is tolerable in spring/fall.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sat Dec 17, 2016 1:25 pm

Those first 2 are pretty cool, although I suspect up close it might be the suck as well. That last pic is kind of what I recall. Pretty much completely devoid of anything scenic.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Sat Dec 17, 2016 4:41 pm

What a shithole